


Salt, anyone?

by shmoopy_myster



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Crack, Derek is a Failwolf, Established Relationship, M/M, when is he not
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-27
Updated: 2013-07-27
Packaged: 2017-12-21 13:31:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/900851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shmoopy_myster/pseuds/shmoopy_myster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Imagine your OTP having dinner with Person B’s parents when Person B asks for ‘Daddy’ to pass the salt, leading both Person A and their father to reach for it.  Bloodshed is optional."</p><p>So I did a lil sumthin<br/>a la Sterek</p>
            </blockquote>





	Salt, anyone?

**Author's Note:**

> Second fic~  
> what do you think?  
> was Derek too much of a Failwolf?

**Thursday night.**

**Stilinski Residence.**

**7:45 pm.**

“Daaaaaaad”

“No, Stiles, for the last time, no.”

“But –“

“I will not take any other answer other than ‘yes, sir.’”

“Daddyyyy”

“No, Stiles. You only use that when you want something your way, and guess what, son? Today is not that day. I will have you both here at 7 pm _sharp_. We will be having steaks and baked potatoes. End of story.” The sheriff huffed with finality.

It had been 6 months since his son had been dating Derek Hale, a man who prowled on teenagers, if his posse was anything to go by. And it had been 2 months since Sherriff Stilinski had found out about this _underage_ relationship. And the icing on the cake? His son has been putting off the official parent-questionable-boyfriend meeting ever since he found out. He was at the end of his tether.

“If that man thinks he can just waltz into your life without clearing it with me first, He is sorely mistaken, son.” He was going to meet Hale for the first time in a non-crime related scene to see if he approved at all of this reunion between him and his son. “Oh, and remind him, I have a gun.”

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Friday night.**

**Stilinski Residence.**

**6:59 pm.**

No, scratch that.

**7:00 pm.**

There was a knock at the door that caused Stiles to drop the salad he was fixing cold turkey.When Stiles opened the door, he was expecting Derek to look a little flustered. After all, he’d been freaking out since last night when Stiles went over to his loft for a movie date and a steamy make-out session, when Stiles oh so casually mentioned his impending doom.

But no. He was faced with something that was beyond priceless, something _photo_ worthy. Derek had a dress shirt on, a classy stripped tie, and black pressed pants. He looked _hot_. And that was saying something, since he always had the sex-on-legs look going for him. But it wasn’t the way this outfit hugged his muscled thighs or his broad chest that had Stiles wishing he had a camera. Although yes, because _c’mon_. No, it was the look of utter _fear_ , a deer-caught-in –head-lights look that really topped it off.

“Derek? You, uh, you ok?”

Derek’s eyes darted around, as if looking for the danger, looking for Stiles father, before landing on his mole speckled boyfriend. He gave a jerky nod before stepping through the threshold. Normally Stiles would expect a peck on the lips, but with the way the alpha looked, he decided to cut him some slack.

“Daddy~ Derek’s here!”

“Don’t try to sweet talk me, Stiles. It isn’t gonna help you or him.”Was the answer he received from the kitchen.

“Alright,” Derek mumbled, “Let’s do this.” He slipped on his expression he would mostly use when facing down an enemy. Which, _seriously_? It was just his dad. Not Godzilla, _geeze_ Derek.

They head into the kitchen to find his dad coming in from the backyard with the steaks he just took off the grill.

“Hello, Derek. Right on time I see. It’s nice to finally and officially meet the man who’s dating my son.”

Derek cleared his throat, “Hi, yes, um thank you for having me, sir.” He then offered his hand, which his father took in a firm grip after several tense seconds.

“Alright, you two head into the dining room. Here, Stiles, take the steaks. I’m going to get us something to drink.”

“Don’t forget to bring the salad!” Stiles called after his dad as he and Derek headed into the dining room. Stiles set down the steaks and went to take a seat when he looked up to see a perplexed look on the werewolf’s face.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, it’s just…where does your father usually sit? I don’t want to…to take his spot or anything…”

Stiles barked out a laugh, “We don’t really have set places, but you can just sit in front of me and let my dad sit at the head of the table.”

Derek took his seat, but stood up once Stiles father walked back in with two beers and a can of coke for Stiles.

“Please, Derek, take a seat.” Derek did so, albeit gingerly, liked a spooked animal. Stiles really shouldn't find this so amusing.

Steaks, baked potatoes, salad, and drinks were handed out. They were eating in a highly uncomfortable silence until Stiles father spoke.

“So, Derek, what do you do for a living?”

It came out casually, too causally. But if Stiles heard the ‘are you just a bum who thinks he’s good enough for my son?’ then Derek heard it too.

“Um, I’m actually taking some online courses at the local university at the moment.”

Derek’s answer seemed to satisfy his father even though he harrumphed at it.

Questions of the same sort were repeatedly fired one after the other at Derek and all Stiles could do was sit back and chew. He’d tried to save his boyfriend a couple of times, but his dad simply gave him a _look_.

Stiles took a sip of his coke, noticed that Derek hadn’t even dared touch his beer, and decided that huh, his baked potato needed a bit of salt. But it was over by Pinky and The Brain (seeing as how they were acting and all), so he tried to wiggle into the conversation long enough to get _someone’s_ attention so they could pass the salt. He tried with little bits of “um, dad?” “Derek hey could you-“ “guys this needs a little bit of-so could you just pass-“to no avail. Derek was completely focused on answering his father to prove his worth, and his father was just as determined to get answers.

So he finally gave up and asked in his sweetest voice, “Daddy, could you please pass the salt?”

Both men halted long enough to both reach for the salt to pass it to the youngest in the room. Their hands collided and their gazes snapped up to the other.

“I believe he was talking to me, Derek.” His father answered in his Sheriff voice. _Uh-oh_. But then his father took in the look on Derek’s face, the blush splotched across his cheeks that went all the way up and tinted his ears red, and sudden realization dawned on all three males in the room. He pulled his hand back from the salt shaker as if it had burned him and groaned, “Stiles, please, _please_ tell me you weren't lying when you said that you two hadn't gone _that_ far in your relationship.”

The blush that practically covered stiles like a blanket told the sheriff otherwise. He then snapped his glare to the man in question.

Stiles thought that the look on Derek’s face when he answered the door was the peak, the limit, but ohohoho was he _wrong_. The look he had on now was sheer mortification, horror, and the look that any criminal would get at being caught. The look that said they were going to run.

And run he did.

Derek sprang out of his chair just as Sheriff Stilinski stood up with enough force to knock over the salt shaker and Derek’s untouched beer.

Stiles was too busy burying his head in his hands and groaning about his life to see Derek make a mad dash for the door, his father hot on his heels, bellowing loud enough for the neighbors to hear, “YOU DADDY-COMPLEX GIVING PEDOPHILE.”

**Author's Note:**

> Come prod me with a stick on Tumblr
> 
> http://the-everything-residence.tumblr.com/ 
> 
> (NSFW)


End file.
